Right honourable my arse

These past few months have seen some of the most interesting and important political events in the history of the United Kingdom. I mean this is the stuff that they're going to be writing in the 2050 version of Lowe's Mastering British History. This is on the same level as the fall of David Lloyd George, the fall of Thatcher, and the election of the Liberals in 1905. In fact, as I write, Mr Brown has undertaken a press conference which could possibly see the fall of his government.

Nevertheless, as much as I'd like to write about Brown, and believe me, I would, I'm going to blog today on the expenses scandal and political reform.

The expenses scandal. Wow. One of the biggest scandals ever. Its one that involved the whole of Parliament, not just one party. MPs have been labelled by many as 'greedy wankers', and I couldn't agree more. Taking our money to fund their own lavish lifestyles, many of whom had them anyway.

But, is this not merely human nature? Madison defined human nature as 'acquisitive and vindicative', which thus leads me to believe that if any normal human being was to be in their situation, they would take advantage of it. I know I would, because until recently, I could have gotten away with it. It is very easy to say that you wouldn't do it, but I guarantee that if you were in that position you would do the same as them.

If the system has existed for years, as the morons at Westminster have said, then the great Churchill probably ripped us off, so probably did Thatcher, and the dastardly left wingers such as Kinnock.

I'm not saying give MPs a break, they bloody well deserve to be put in prison, but at least consider what you would have done in their situation. Honestly though.

Political reform is something that is on the lips of the nation. Well actually no it isn't but if you watch the news then it may interest you. Some say get rid of First Past The Post, some say have fixed term Parliaments. But really, what difference is it going to make?

PR may sound all well and good, but if you want things to get done, and I know I do, PR is not the answer. We will get coalition governments, who can't agree on anything, even the colour of the curtains in 10 Downing St. There would also be the possibility of the 3rd place party holding the balance of power, which is basically handing power to a party that most of the country didn't vote for. Would YOU want the Lib Dems holding the country to ransom, or even worse, Labour? Unless you support them, which is probably very few people, the answer will most certainly be no.

The main problem here is not the system, but the way that politics is conducted. The current people are snivelling weasels who couldn't give a shit about the country, only themselves.

There is only one solution. Elect me as Prime Minister. Or Jeremy Clarkson.